Whether it is physical pain or mental anguish, pain affects all of us. When we are in physical pain, there’s a message carried up by our nervous systems that shoots to our brains to say ‘hey, you’re in pain’. When we are sad or depressed, our emotions tend to take control. We can manage physical and mental pain with many things including but not limited to: medication, meditation, acupuncture, and breath work. Which got me to thinking about stoicism and tarot… naturally.

Stoics on Pain

There are some who are stoic when it comes to pain, and you never hear a peep out of them. Others are not so stoic, and are incredibly vocal. Some choose to remain in a victim mentality, never moving outside of the pain. Fear and anxiety from the pain itself ends up controlling them and their actions in often explosive outbursts or the extreme other end of the spectrum in escapism. Stoicism is not about being quiet necessarily but it is about not letting the external stimuli control you.

That which does not kill us, makes us stronger.

-Frederich Nietzsche

Okay, sounds a little harsh. But try thinking of it this way. You got out of whatever it was… alive. Chances are, the negative circumstance which you were experiencing in the past are no longer present. You not only overcame it, but you still here in the flesh. Hence being stronger now in present day.

How We Handle Pain

Breath – A Pain Response

Holding our breath while we are in physically or mental pain is one of the worst things that we can do. It actually increases the painful stimuli. Holding one’s breath is a natural response, and an initial response to pain. But in turn, holding our breath actually increases our pain. A catch twenty two, if you will. When pain strikes, we hold your breath, and the pain increases. It is now the pain controlling us, and not us controlling it. When we apply soft control, deciding to breathe, we not only slow down our heart rate, but we also find relief.

Distraction or Lack Thereof

Distraction also helps in pain relief, but lack of distraction can be detrimental. At night when we are alone is when we tend to feel the most pain which again can be physical and mental. It is at night when we sit alone with our thoughts in the dark quiet of the night. A nice conversation with a loved one, or being entertained by external stimuli like music or reading causes the pain to fade away.

The Loop

Perseverating on the fact that we are in pain can lead to a vicious cycle of not only panic and fear that the pain will come back acutely. But also that the pain will never go away, becoming a chronic issue. Perseverating is a very dangerous loop to get caught in. It is only when we move out of that loop, that we can regain some control over the situation at hand. As seen in the quote by Marcus Aurelius. The analogy of treating wild dogs seems fitting. This primal sensation of painful stimuli needs a soft control.

We should treat painful sensations like wild dogs. They will bite and tear at our heels the more we try to flea and panic, but will often back down if we have the courage to turn and face them calmly.

–Marcus Aurelius

The Strength Card in the Tarot

The strength card in the tarot is highly relatable to these concepts of stoicism. When we think of the strength card, we think of strength over courage.

The strength card shows a woman standing over a lion. She is not harming the lion. In fact, she is petting him with slow and steady control. There is bravery and courage noted as she approaches the lion. She radiates health, and is bold in her approach yet compassionate. While petting the lion, he licks her arm. It takes some tenacity and boldness to approach a beast as such. But she is persuading the lion to follow her lead. To trust her.

It’s kind of like your patience is being tested in a sense. Having the courage to approach something you once thought was scary, and would lead to your demise. This card is about asserting control over the unforeseen circumstances that are present. Instead of being stuck in doubt and filled with anxiety, you tap into your inner strength and raw power.

Marcus Aurelius on Strength

You have the power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.

-Marcus Aurelius

Food for Thought

When I think about pain, I think about what I can control. Sure, if my arm has been chewed off… I would probably cry and be really scared. But usually the external stimuli are not that traumatic nor in present time. Perhaps it’s about taking a look in the mirror at ourselves, and where we have been. Knowing that we have overcome so much. We have won so many battles. Moving on from whatever it was that caused us pain. Knowing that we all have the ability to tame our inner primal instincts. Remembering that living in peace and happiness is an innate right for us all. It is up to us to show up for ourselves with strength and courage everyday. To know what we can control, and what we cannot.

-Keri

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